* Why should I bless people who frustrate me? What’s the benefit to me?

Why should I bless people who consistently frustrate me, people who seem to intentionally push my buttons or act in ways that I find deeply irritating and counterproductive? What practical benefit, either short-term or long-term, do I actually receive from offering them blessings, whether that blessing is expressed verbally, through positive action, or even just maintained as a positive thought? Does blessing them actually change their behavior, or am I just setting myself up for further frustration and potential exploitation? Are there situations where blessing is truly counterproductive, and if so, how can I discern the difference? Essentially, what’s the ROI on blessing my personal antagonists?

Answer

Blessing those who frustrate you can be a complex and challenging practice, but it is often rooted in principles of personal growth, emotional well-being, and spiritual or ethical values. Here’s a breakdown of potential benefits:

Personal Growth and Emotional Well-being:

• Reduces Negative Emotions: Harboring resentment, anger, and frustration towards others can be emotionally draining and damaging to your mental health. Blessing them, even if only internally, can be a way to release those negative emotions and find inner peace. It helps you shift your focus from their perceived offense to your own emotional state.

• Promotes Forgiveness: Blessing someone can be a step toward forgiveness, not necessarily condoning their actions, but releasing yourself from the burden of holding onto anger and resentment. Forgiveness doesn’t mean forgetting, but choosing not to let past actions control your present.

• Breaks Cycles of Negativity: Reacting with negativity often perpetuates negative cycles in relationships and interactions. Blessing can be a way to disrupt these cycles and promote a more positive and constructive dynamic, even if the other person doesn’t reciprocate.

• Increases Empathy and Understanding: Intentionally blessing someone can encourage you to see them as a whole person with their own struggles and motivations, even if you don’t agree with their actions. It helps to develop empathy by recognizing that their behavior may stem from their own pain, insecurities, or misunderstanding.

• Cultivates Inner Peace: When you consistently bless others, you develop a more compassionate and forgiving outlook, leading to greater inner peace and emotional resilience. It shifts your mindset from being reactive to proactive in managing your emotional responses.

• Improved Self-Control: Choosing to bless instead of react with anger or frustration demonstrates self-control and emotional maturity. It empowers you to respond in a way that aligns with your values rather than being driven by impulsive reactions.

Spiritual/Ethical Considerations (Dependent on Belief System):

• Living Out Values: Many spiritual traditions emphasize compassion, love, and forgiveness. Blessing others, even those who frustrate you, is a practical way to live out these values and align your actions with your beliefs.

• Spiritual Growth: The act of blessing can be seen as a spiritual practice that fosters growth in compassion, humility, and unconditional love. It can be a way to deepen your connection to something larger than yourself.

• Breaking Down Barriers: In some spiritual contexts, blessing is believed to create a positive energetic field that can help break down barriers between you and others, fostering healing and reconciliation.

Practical Benefits (Depending on Circumstances):

• Improved Relationships (Potentially): While not guaranteed, a shift in your attitude towards someone can sometimes indirectly lead to a more positive change in their behavior toward you. Kindness and understanding can sometimes diffuse tense situations.

• Better Communication: Blessing can create a more open and receptive environment for communication. When you approach a situation with a sense of goodwill, it becomes easier to address conflicts constructively.

• Reduced Conflict: Blessing can act as a buffer against escalating conflict. By responding with grace instead of aggression, you avoid fueling the fire and potentially de-escalate the situation.

How to "Bless" Someone:

It’s important to clarify what "blessing" someone means in this context. It doesn’t necessarily involve a religious ceremony. It can be as simple as:

• Silent Blessing: Silently wishing them well, praying for their well-being, or hoping for their happiness.

• Positive Thoughts: Intentionally focusing on their good qualities or aspects of their life that you appreciate.

• Acts of Kindness: Performing small acts of kindness or service, even if it’s just offering a helping hand or a listening ear.

• Verbal Affirmations: If appropriate and genuine, expressing positive sentiments or offering words of encouragement.

Important Considerations:

• Authenticity: The act of blessing should be genuine, even if it’s a small step. Forced or insincere blessings can be counterproductive.

• Personal Boundaries: Blessing someone doesn’t mean allowing them to mistreat you. It’s important to maintain healthy boundaries and protect yourself from harm.

• Self-Care: Blessing others shouldn’t come at the expense of your own well-being. Ensure you are taking care of your own emotional needs first.

• Realistic Expectations: Don’t expect instant or dramatic changes in the other person’s behavior. The primary benefit is to you, in terms of your inner peace and emotional growth.

In summary, blessing those who frustrate you is primarily a benefit to you. It is a practice that can reduce negativity, promote forgiveness, increase empathy, and cultivate inner peace. It aligns with ethical and spiritual values and can potentially improve relationships and reduce conflict. However, it requires authenticity, healthy boundaries, and a focus on self-care.

Pray This Prayer

Heavenly Father,

I come before you today wrestling with a difficult feeling. My heart feels tight and conflicted. I find myself asking, “Why should I bless people who frustrate me? What’s the benefit to me?”

I confess that my instinct is to hold back, to protect myself from further irritation. I see only the annoyance, the inconvenience, the way they push my buttons. It feels counterintuitive to wish them well, to offer a blessing.

Lord, help me to see beyond my own immediate discomfort. Open my eyes to understand the bigger picture, to see the situation through Your loving gaze. Help me to remember that everyone, even those who frustrate me, are your children, loved and precious in your sight.

Perhaps, Lord, blessing them allows me to release the bitterness I hold. Maybe it softens my heart, allowing me to move beyond resentment and towards understanding. Perhaps it’s a chance for me to grow in patience and compassion, reflecting Your own boundless love.

I know that blessing others isn’t about them, it’s about me becoming more like you. Help me to release my need for control and allow Your grace to flow through me, even to those I find difficult.

Show me, Lord, the transformative power of blessing. Help me to see that by wishing well for others, I am ultimately blessing myself with peace, understanding, and a deeper connection to You.

Help me to see the good in them, even when it’s buried deep. Help me to offer them a genuine blessing, and in doing so, receive Your blessings in return.

In Jesus’ name, I pray. Amen.