What does the Bible say, both explicitly and implicitly, about singleness? Specifically, I’m interested in exploring whether the Bible frames singleness as a valuable or even necessary period in a person’s life for focused personal growth, spiritual development, and preparation for future roles and responsibilities, whether that includes marriage later on or a lifelong commitment to singleness. Are there particular biblical figures who exemplify this principle, and how did their singleness contribute to their overall calling and purpose? How does the Bible address the societal pressures and expectations surrounding marriage, particularly in ancient contexts, and how might that apply to the modern experience of singleness? Finally, how does the New Testament’s emphasis on serving God without distraction relate to the concept of singleness as a season for concentrated dedication to ministry and spiritual formation?
Answer
The Bible doesn’t explicitly state “singleness is a time for growth and preparation” in a single verse. However, various biblical passages and principles suggest singleness can be a valuable period for spiritual development, focused service, and preparation for future roles, whether marriage or lifelong singleness.
Focus on God and Spiritual Growth:
- 1 Corinthians 7:32-35: This passage is often cited as the core biblical text addressing singleness. Paul argues that the unmarried man or woman is free to be concerned about the Lord’s affairs and how to please Him, without the divided loyalties that can accompany marriage. This freedom allows for greater focus on prayer, studying scripture, and serving in ministry. It suggests singleness can be a time for intensified devotion and spiritual growth.
- Serving God Unhindered: Paul’s point is not that married people cannot serve God effectively, but that singleness provides a unique opportunity to dedicate one’s time, energy, and resources to God’s work without the demands and responsibilities of a spouse and family. This allows for more flexible schedules, travel for missions, and deeper involvement in church activities.
- Spiritual Gifts: Singleness can be a time to discover and develop spiritual gifts for the benefit of the church and the world. Without the immediate demands of family, individuals may have more time and freedom to explore and use their gifts in various ministries.
Preparation for Future Roles:
- Character Development: Singleness can be a time to cultivate essential character qualities, such as patience, self-discipline, contentment, and reliance on God. Learning to manage finances, household responsibilities, and personal relationships independently can foster maturity and resilience.
- Learning and Skill Development: Without the demands of marriage, single individuals may have more time to pursue education, learn new skills, or develop talents that can be used for their career, ministry, or personal fulfillment. This preparation can be valuable regardless of whether they eventually marry or remain single.
- Understanding Relationships: Singleness can be a time to learn about healthy relationships by observing others, seeking wise counsel, and reflecting on past experiences. This understanding can be helpful for building strong friendships, family relationships, and, if marriage is in the future, a healthy marital relationship.
- Discerning God’s Will: For those who desire marriage, singleness can be a time of seeking God’s will for their lives, discerning the type of partner they are seeking, and preparing themselves to be a godly spouse. This involves prayer, self-reflection, and seeking guidance from trusted mentors or spiritual leaders.
Examples in Scripture:
- Jesus: Jesus himself was single and dedicated his life entirely to serving God and fulfilling his mission. He is presented as the ultimate example of a life lived in devotion to God.
- Paul: The Apostle Paul was likely single (though there is some debate), and he used his singleness to travel extensively, preach the gospel, and plant churches throughout the Roman Empire. His dedication to ministry was greatly facilitated by his unmarried status.
- Other Devoted Individuals: Throughout the Bible, there are examples of single individuals who played significant roles in God’s plan, such as prophets, judges, and other leaders who were focused on serving God and his people.
Important Considerations:
- Singleness is not inherently superior to marriage: The Bible values both singleness and marriage as valid callings. 1 Corinthians 7 emphasizes that each person has a unique gift from God, and neither state is inherently better than the other.
- Singleness can be challenging: The Bible acknowledges that singleness can be difficult, particularly in a culture that often emphasizes marriage and family. Loneliness, societal expectations, and the desire for companionship can be real challenges.
- The Church’s Role: The church has a responsibility to support and encourage single individuals, providing community, fellowship, and opportunities for service. Single people should be valued and integrated into all aspects of church life.
- Contentment in Singleness: Philippians 4:11-13 highlights the importance of being content in all circumstances. While it is natural to desire marriage, single individuals are encouraged to find joy and fulfillment in their present circumstances, trusting that God has a purpose for their lives, whether single or married.
Pray This Prayer
Heavenly Father,
I come before you today acknowledging the season of singleness I am in. I sometimes feel lost and uncertain, wondering about your plans for my life. But I know that you are a God of purpose, and you have a reason for everything.
Lord, I ask for your guidance as I seek to understand what the Bible says about singleness as a time for growth and preparation. Help me to see beyond societal pressures and romantic ideals. Open my heart to the wisdom contained in your Word, so that I may understand how to best utilize this time in my life.
Remind me, Lord, that singleness is not a waiting room for marriage, but a valuable time to deepen my relationship with you. Empower me to cultivate the fruits of the spirit: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.
Help me to use this time to focus on serving you and others. Direct me toward opportunities where I can use my gifts and talents to bless your kingdom and impact the world around me.
Give me clarity, wisdom, and discernment in my choices. Help me to develop my character, strengthen my faith, and grow in maturity, so that I may be better equipped for whatever future you have in store for me.
Thank you, Father, for your love and your unwavering presence in my life. I trust that you are working all things together for my good. I surrender this season of singleness to you, knowing that you are in control.
In Jesus’ name, I pray. Amen.